Friday, March 5, 2010

Work

I have been working now for two an d a half years, and, most of the time, I have liked it.I really love the company I work for, love it so much that I am willing to tolerate and simply live with all the problems I once in a while see in it. Also, I joined the company in a very strong and organized department, whose structure I understood and felt comfortable with.
However, there is nothing good that lasts forever, and things started to change last summer.
You might wonder what I am referring to, as I have clearly stated I love the company... I do love it, but the department I am in has imploded, its structure, management, and even the handling of the employees and their projects has changed.
Until January I had not realized how important the variable "organization you work in" was for me, but after my vacation I came to understand that, regardless of the work I do, I also need to feel comfortable where I am.
So here I am, wondering what I should do next. I have an interesting offer in Cincinnati, in a city that I do not like at all, but in a country that I love, and where I want to return.
I could quit my job, and return to Colombia for six months or so. In Colombia I could either work in dad's company, or find a job as a tutor for math, or take some courses in a college and maybe homologate my degrees in Colombia so in the future, if I choose to, I can work in Colombia. There are countless opportunities.
I could also continue working til the end of the year, and saving money like mad, and then take off for a year or so to India, Indonesia, Australia, or simply wherever the wind takes me to.
Going back to college and getting a Masters, and maybe even a PhD would also be an option. Why not? If I decided to go back, I would probably finish both around my 30th birthday, which is a pretty decent time, and age, to be done with two bachelors, a masters and a PhD.
Going back to the offer in Cinci, I could take it and move back into the US in the near future. I would sacrifice my vacation (in the US I would get 2 weeks a year, here I have 6!), and all that I have achieved here in the past two and a half years. Would it be worth it? It took me a long while to get used to my life here, but now I do enjoy it, except for work half of the time. I have some good friends, a beautiful apartment and the best car in the world.
Lastly, I could no nothing, and stay where I am. Summer is approaching, and my mood will be better soon. It is only 2 weeks left until there is more day than night, and with it one of the biggest variables and depression triggers in me will no longer be present until September.
The current situation is my first big problem since I started leading my own life, and I am afraid that if I don't confront it and try to solve it on my own terms, I will never learn to handle these situations. Risky situation as I don't want to picture myself always running away and starting from zero just to avoid facing and solving my problems. But is it worth to keep figthing, and eventually failing?
Escape is the easiest way out. It is not necessary safe. And it won't help me solve my future problems. And now I need to decide between safety or easiness, or simply facing things as they are, solving them, and hopefully feeling the pride of reaching my goals on my own terms.

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