What If

What if...
Probably the most common thought I go through on a daily basis. What if?

Every day in life there is a need to take decisions. These may require little or no thought, or, on the other side, they might require a detailed analysis of what the consequences could be.
What if I skip lunch, is an easy one. What if I go back to school, is a pretty difficult one.

The reason behind this writting is an apparently easy decision, which turned out to be more meaningful than I ever suspected.

This girl, I am going to call her HappyGirl, showed in a short period of time a ardical change of attitude. I met her about six months ago, and she was a quiet person, a girl people liked, and who was always a nice company in the smoker's corner. About two months ago, after christmas break, she started acting differently: she was always loud, started sending inappropriate emails, and gained herself a difficult reputation among those of us who knew her.

HappyGirl invited me for dinner some 4 weeks ago, and during our dinner she told me she was on some anti-depressive medication. Instantly I suspected the doctor had not been following her as regularly as he should, and knew nothing of the change in attitude she was showing. I decided not to say anything, following my golden rule: "If it is not your life, it is not your problem".
Was I mistaken?

HappyGirl lost contact with reality 2 weeks ago. She returned to her home country (Rumors say she was forced back by her family), and taken into a hospital.

What if I had said something? Could I have impacted her in a good way? Could my action had stopped her, or at least made her aware of what was going on with her in other people's eyes, which she didn't notice? Would she still be in Germany?

What if? Two words and a question mark. Two words that have been hunting me since she left. It seemed obvious it wasn't my problem: She has family and we were not even close friends. However, it looks like I was one of the few people who saw a reason behind her changes. Did seeing this reason give me responsibility on her? What if I had said something? Her life after she recovers won't be the same. She will no longer work where she used to in Germany, she will have to find herself again, and probably in a new environment, with new challenges.

What if?