Ever since I can remember I have defined myself by my success at school and work: As a little kid, and after the bullying at school started, my grades mattered the most and were my defense wall against other kids. The behaviour stuck with me and in college and work I kept defining my success and meaning as a person through my grades and rating.
I never really thought of it as a problem, besides the emptiness I felt when things didn't go as planned until a few weeks ago, during my last trip to Asia. I am not sure what the trigger was, maybe it was the time I spent thinking, maybe it was the fact that I was blessed with a travel group where most people where around my age and we could talk without inhibitions about ourselves, our motivitions and future plans, or the fact that some of them had quit their jobs and were looking for a fresh start. Regardless of what the source was, towards the end of the trip I found myself looking at who I am as a person, not as an employee, and not quite sure how to handle it.
I am a person who likes to meet people, who enjoys philosophical conversations and discussions, who likes to learn and is not ashamed of recognizing her own limitations. I admire the cultures that live their lives based on respect (Respect for God, Respect for Each other and Respect for the Nature), and feel happy when I am included into a group regardless of my background, my culture or the type of job I do.
I have found also I find it more meaningful to do a job that is not intended to increase profits of a company, but just to do something well done. Yes, profit is required, but in order to increase profit we should not go over the employees and put their health and well being at jeopardy.
Looking at all these findings, I have to start thinking about the next steps I am planning in life, or how to actually go on with them: Is it the right move to stay in the company? Would it be better to find a new job? Or should I look into moving to a country, at least for a fixed time, where the respect culture is the base of life, and see if I find myself in the right place there?
It is a scary moment in life, changing the perspective on yourself turns everything you have done and planned upside down. It is also a great opportunity to find a new direction in life, and the only questions open are which the new direction should be and whether or not I will have the courage to pursue them.
I never really thought of it as a problem, besides the emptiness I felt when things didn't go as planned until a few weeks ago, during my last trip to Asia. I am not sure what the trigger was, maybe it was the time I spent thinking, maybe it was the fact that I was blessed with a travel group where most people where around my age and we could talk without inhibitions about ourselves, our motivitions and future plans, or the fact that some of them had quit their jobs and were looking for a fresh start. Regardless of what the source was, towards the end of the trip I found myself looking at who I am as a person, not as an employee, and not quite sure how to handle it.
I am a person who likes to meet people, who enjoys philosophical conversations and discussions, who likes to learn and is not ashamed of recognizing her own limitations. I admire the cultures that live their lives based on respect (Respect for God, Respect for Each other and Respect for the Nature), and feel happy when I am included into a group regardless of my background, my culture or the type of job I do.
I have found also I find it more meaningful to do a job that is not intended to increase profits of a company, but just to do something well done. Yes, profit is required, but in order to increase profit we should not go over the employees and put their health and well being at jeopardy.
Looking at all these findings, I have to start thinking about the next steps I am planning in life, or how to actually go on with them: Is it the right move to stay in the company? Would it be better to find a new job? Or should I look into moving to a country, at least for a fixed time, where the respect culture is the base of life, and see if I find myself in the right place there?
It is a scary moment in life, changing the perspective on yourself turns everything you have done and planned upside down. It is also a great opportunity to find a new direction in life, and the only questions open are which the new direction should be and whether or not I will have the courage to pursue them.
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